Growing up with a sister was the greatest – I had a live-in permanent friend to play with, and she did as well. We loved being together, sharing toys, dance lessons (and dance parties), playing barbies, and My Little Pony. It was everything a parent could dream of having multiple children of the same sex. Until I got a bit older, around 5, when I became a tomboy. I loved fire trucks, race cars, sports, watching WWE with my dad, playing with Ken, not Barbie. I played soccer (I was the goalie), but also took dance classes. I was mistaken in public for a boy several times. I had super short hair, just like a boy, mushroom cut and all. I was the boy that my dad never had, as I like to say.
As I got older many of my friends talked about getting married and having children. I never thought of my life going in that direction. I never dreamed of having children – or becoming a mom. Did I want to get married? Of course. Did I want to have a family? No. If you asked me even in my early twenties if I wanted children my answer would have been “NO”. A very firm one at that. I love babies. They are cute and squishy, but I could always pass them off if they started to cry, spit-up, or take a poop. Once they got past the squishy phase I never paid any attention to kids. They just bugged me. I can’t even tell you why or what reason, I was just never a kid person. I was always that person that would say “seriously shut your kid up” or “shouldn’t that kid be in bed.” I had friends that had kids, but I wanted nothing to do with them. I just never had that motherly gene passed down to me.
It wasn’t until I hit my late 20’s and found my handsome prince that I became “interested” in having a family. I would always tell people I wanted ONE child and for it to be a boy because I could never imagine having a girl like me. HA – a strong, outspoken, loud, strong-willed, and selfish girl. Since much of my childhood I was labeled as a tomboy it was my comfort zone to want a boy. I related to boys better, sports, dirt, rambunctiousness, and all the other “boy” things. In my head it just made sense.
After Mikey and I were married for a few years, we started to dabble with the idea of starting our family, and yes, I was still firm with the idea of only having one child. We ended up pregnant just after our 3rd wedding anniversary and found out it was a BOY! I was beyond elated. I never knew the type of love that you could have for a child that you haven’t even laid eyes on yet, but I did, and it was amazing. Vincent is everything to me. He’s a ball to the wall Momma’s boy, and I love everything about that. He’s my world, the part that I didn’t know I was missing. He is messy, sporty, high-strung, smart, sassy, and anti-crafty just like his Momma. I love him, but just can’t swing loving other kids.
I thought after having a child I would change my tune and I would be in “love” with kids and be this mushy hearted lady who just scoops up kids, loves on them, and wants to take them home. Well, apparently I am still missing the aforementioned motherly gene. I love my son dearly, but I’m still definitely not a kid type of person. Yes, I have empathy for the mom in Target with her child having a tantrum or the mom who is trying to get her kid in their car seat while they are screaming like they are being beaten. I have been there and understand you – I feel you! Let’s chat and vent together over coffee!
I hate arts and crafts. If my child did an art project one million percent – it was more than likely done at daycare. I am not a DIY mom, or a Pinterest mom, or a mom who will sit and color with their child. I am just not that mom. I will do things that will make me happy and in return make Vinny happy. I will host playgroups so I can have some adult conversation while Vinny plays with his friends. I will be at my son’s games with snacks in tow so I can be that crazy bleacher mom and still be involved with my child’s activities. I will do all the motherly things I need and LIKE to do. I am not the mom who will babysit other kids, get down and carry on conversations with other children, color with other children, or play games with kids. I am not a kid’s mom – I’m a mom’s mom!
