Lately, I’ve really felt the weight of allthethings bearing down on me. Like I don’t have time to catch my breath before one activity starts and the next begins. That it’s impossible to complete one single task before being interrupted by someone or something. Honestly, my life seems to be in a constant state of chaos, with little or no downtime. And you know what? It’s frustrating!
I want to do allthethings!
Homeroom mom? Sign me up! Preschool classroom volunteer? Me! A good and supportive friend who has time for an impromptu cup of coffee or a glass of wine? Yes, love it! An active part of my book club who actually finishes or frankly even has time to read the monthly book? My hand is raised.
I just don’t have allthetime!
Busy Mamas, I know you get it! Mom Life is busy. It may sound trite, but there really is no other word that describes it more fully or succinctly. All moms deep in the trenches of raising their kiddos are crazy busy. And I’m going to go out on a limb here and just say it:
Moms are the busiest people I know. If there is an equal to the type of busy that is inherent to being an active and involved mom, I haven’t yet encountered it. We wear so many hats and do so many different things, sometimes all at once. It’s not just one type of busy. It’s allthebusy, allthetime!
If only we could freeze time. I want to be like Hermione Granger with her Time-Turner in Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban. Imagine if there was really a way to somehow capture a few more hours or even minutes throughout the day, between one commitment and the next. Honestly, with three little ones, I don’t feel like I have much time at all beyond what I’m actually responsible for doing and being. I’m not complaining, and I don’t feel guilty. But, again, I feel frustrated. Sometimes I even feel inadequate.
My husband is the first person to point out how foolish this is. He fully respects and recognizes that like many busy moms, the amount of work that I do from 6 am until lunchtime could and should occasionally qualify for Olympic Sports status. He’ll say nice things like “Well, you packed lunches, made breakfast, got three kids dressed, ready, out the door and to school on time, and made it to a morning meeting. I think you’re doing alright”.
I often beg to differ, but I understand and appreciate his point and the gentle reminders that:
- It’s ok to slow down every once in a while. It really is.
- Slowing down, or not completing every item on my “to do” lists doesn’t make me inadequate, and I shouldn’t feel frustrated when all of my obligations aren’t fulfilled, or if I need to drop a few items or plans from my schedule.
Easier said than done, right?! Yes, but not impossible. So, as we embark on a new season with the start of Spring, I’m challenging myself to start a new chapter in my life:
- I will commit to being open and honest with myself and with others about the level of commitment that I am capable of exercising during this crazy busy time in my life.
- I will attempt to recognize that not everything on my to-do list will always get checked off, that not all of my obligations will necessarily be met.
- I will try to learn that I can only do what I can do with the time that I am given. It serves no use to get frustrated about what I cannot change. I’m not Hermione Granger {although really, busy mamas, imagine what we could all accomplish with that Time-Turner!}
Most importantly, I will try to learn that it really is OK to say: “yes, I want to be there, I want to participate, I want to do allthethings. But I can’t right now. I just don’t have allthetime.”
