As a mother of toddlers, I always looked at parents dedicating their lives to their children’s busy extracurricular activities as making things harder on their kids. I would think there is no way their kid wants to come home from school, rush to finish their homework, and then spend three nights a week at practice. Add on top of that the fact that they have to miss playtime and birthday parties for weekend competitions. I’d think, why do that to your child?
Turns out, you don’t do anything to your child; instead, your child does it to you.
My daughter fell in love with figure skating. It was a whirlwind romance: she tried it once, loved it, and within a few months, she was trying out for a synchronized skating team. Her complaining she was cold quickly turned to, “Ugh, Mom! I don’t need gloves. NO ONE wears gloves!” Forcing her to quickly eat a slice of pizza from the concession stand before practice became, “Mom, I don’t want to eat at home. Can I just eat at the rink?” She wants to be there, and I’m just along for the ride.
I made it extremely clear from the beginning that we aren’t doing this for me. I could probably count on one hand the number of times I laced up a pair of ice skates before the first time she stepped on the ice. If this is something she wants to do, I will do everything I can to support her and encourage her along the way. We make sacrifices financially, and the whole family makes sacrifices with our time.
Soccer, dance, baseball. The list goes on. Parents are making the decisions earlier to give their kids every advantage when it comes to sports and making the commitment to higher competitive levels. When it comes to figure skating, I’m not doing it for a scholarship down the road or even high school sports. The hard truth is that for a lot of kids to have a chance at those things, early introduction to sports has become crucial. Gone are the days where kicking a soccer ball around the yard with friends is an indication you have a good chance at making the freshman team. The kids at tryouts will have been playing since they were five, having private coaching lessons and more than likely playing on a travel team with half the other kids trying out, as well.
What is important to realize is that these kids aren’t just doing something they love; they want to excel at it. These sports aren’t something the parents are paying for because they think it would be fun to try out. These parents are taking the potential they see in their children and trying to give them every advantage they can.
It’s so easy to look in from the outside and raise an eyebrow at how our day-to-day life is scheduled right now. She practices three nights a week, has one night at catechism, and then sprinkles in weekend competitions that range from one to three-night hotel stays. All of this on top of school, which means she is also making time for homework, studying for tests, and completing projects. But, the truth is, is that she loves every minute of it.
OK, that was kind of a lie. We have the same third grade homework struggles as everyone else. She does not love that! However, we embrace the hectic schedule and make it part of our lives. The teammates become friends. The practice becomes playtime. Those cliche number stickers that say “Skating is Life” become far too real.
I hope one day when my daughter looks back on this time, she sees more than just the skating and even the sacrifices we made for her to do it. I hope she looks back and appreciates that we wanted her to find something she loves and not only encouraged her to do it but to do it well.
