I know, I know. You probably just finally finished paying off the December credit card bill, or maybe only recently tucked the last stray bit of tinsel into a storage bin. The last thing most people want to think about when the flowers are just starting to bloom is planning for the holidays. It feels counterintuitive, perhaps even a little bit “extra.”
But hear me out.
Right now, your memory is fresh. You still remember exactly which toy caused the most excitement and which side dish sat untouched. By the time November rolls around, those details will be a foggy blur, replaced by the frantic energy of to-do lists and school programs.
I promise you this: if you take just a few hours now to do some low-stakes planning, your future self (the one trying to navigate a crowded grocery store on December 22nd) will want to go back in time and give you a massive hug. Here is how I’m setting myself up for a stress-free holiday season starting right now.
The Post-Holiday Digital Audit
The most powerful tool for a busy mom is her phone, but not for social media–for documentation. One of the first things I do early in the year is open a fresh note in my phone dedicated to the upcoming holiday season.
I do a complete brain dump of the previous year while the details are still sharp. I make a list of everything I cooked for Thanksgiving dinner, Christmas dinner, and the various holiday parties we attended. Then, I get honest.
• The “Keep” List: Which recipes were a total hit?
• The “Toss” List: Which dish took four hours to make but only two people ate?
By making these notes now, I’m essentially building a customized holiday playbook. When the season rolls around, I don’t have to wonder if I should try that new cranberry sauce again; I just check my notes.
Reviewing the Activity Calendar
We often feel pressured to do all the light shows, parades, tree farms, and craft fairs. But let’s be real: some of those activities are more stressful than they are magical. I take a moment to review our family activities from last year. I note which ones felt like a chore and which ones actually fostered connection.
For instance, I realized that the high-stress, expensive events weren’t nearly as successful as the nights we stayed home, baked cookies, and drank hot chocolate.
The “Family Vision” Night
This past year, we started a new tradition that I’m definitely keeping. We had a few low-key nights where we baked cookies and talked as a family about what our ideal holiday looks like. It turns out, my kids didn’t care about the fancy events. They just wanted more time in their pajamas watching movies. Knowing this now allows me to say “no” to the things that don’t matter later.
The Kids’ Questionnaire
If you want to make the holidays easier, stop guessing. I’ve started using a fun questionnaire for the kids early in the holiday season to get a pulse on their interests. Some of the questions are practical for gift-giving, while others are just silly ways to connect and slow down. It’s a way to get into their heads without the pressure of a formal Christmas list.
Some of our favorite questions include:
• What was your favorite family vacation we’ve ever taken?
• Do you prefer receiving gift cards or going shopping in actual stores?
• Which is better: sledding or ice skating?
• Would you rather have a glowing nose like Rudolph or long, pointy ears like an elf?
These questionnaires give me a goldmine of information for the holidays, and they serve as a sweet memento of what they were into at this specific age.
Strategic Off-Season Shopping
When you shop for the holidays during the holidays, you pay a premium for convenience. When you shop in the off-months, you find the treasures.
I keep a running list of holiday needs/wants in my phone. Right now, I’m watching for sales on things like gift wrap, ribbons, and themed items that usually cost a fortune in December.
The Santa Surprise Tradition
A few years ago, I started a tradition where I change the kids’ sheets and pillowcases to holiday prints and put mini Christmas trees in their rooms on the day they go to see Santa. When they get home from meeting the man in red, their rooms have been transformed into a winter wonderland.
The only reason this tradition is sustainable and affordable is because I bought those holiday sheets and mini trees during an off season sale. It’s a high-impact magical moment for them that costs me very little money and zero December stress because the items are already tucked away in my closet, ready to go.
Managing the Mental Load
The mental load of motherhood is so heavy in December. By deciding on your gift strategy, your must-do traditions, and your menu in the early months of the year, you are reclaiming your peace!
You aren’t just planning a party, you’re curating an atmosphere. When you aren’t stressed and frantic, your family gets to enjoy your presence and you can actually enjoy the hot cocoa with them.
Thinking about the holidays now isn’t about being obsessed with Christmas; it’s about being obsessed with peace. It’s about recognizing that a little bit of intentionality today creates a lot of room for joy tomorrow.
So, open up a blank note on your phone today. Write down one thing that went well last year and one thing you’d like to skip. Your December self will thank you!
