Are you like me? Thoughts are fleeting, moments of concentration are scattered and trying to complete something on the to-do list is hard! These little tidbits of something are often interrupted by a little one… Some days this frustrates the living end of me, but other days, I have my head on in a direction that I’m able to appreciate the little moment and THEIR thought, setting my own aside – and then I get the gift of seeing their perspective of what my little one is experiencing.
The other day, I was working on my website updates (www.kmbdetails.com and our launch of the new area in architectural photography), and the little one kept coming to me for something. Not going to lie, I was annoyed. I was anxious to post my site. However, a little something in my mind said “it’s not important to upload this photo NOW – go and see what he needs” – so I went.
He had created a beautiful library, yes a library. Books on shelves he moved and positioned just right, tables for work – with pencils waiting, a magazine area, and even a check out computer – complete with a keyboard and mouse. CREATIVE! Wow. My mind was blown. He even had a library card for me. He made everything himself and was so proud when I checked out a book from HIS own library. He’s not quite 4. I was impressed. He was so pleased.
It took 10 minutes. Best 10 minutes of my day. I challenge you to go and see what your kid has to show,
that item you are working for, it can wait.
I’ve been thinking about his library for a few days now – he’s re-created it in various ways, sometimes including his brother, sometimes his brother taking over the whole thing. It makes me wonder – what do I currently step in on and re-create or do for him that he is so passionate about? Do I squash his opportunity to grow and challenge himself? Do I brush him off too often so I can complete one more item on my to-do list? Is there a way we can both do something together AND get a task done? I like to think that I have gotten better about it, but still, I ask myself ‘can I do better?’ The answer is clear: of course. But I am doing OK too.
I love to offer my kids the opportunity to try before I help (if possible). I struggle with the time that goes into having the project take longer, but also truly appreciate the gift that it gives them by offering the opportunity of working it through on their own. I love to set them up for success without them seeing it as a deliberate move on my side. It’s kind of a game, at least that is how I look at it.
My older son and I don’t see much of each other now that school is in session. I miss him! Last night, I had a whole host of things that ‘needed to be done’ – I caught myself trying to rush him into bed, when I stopped and asked if he would like to help me with the project of getting the dirt ready for new grass seed, surprisingly, he said yes and was out the door ready to help. He helped, he worked HARD, and he talked. He told me about his new friends, his work, his projects, and that he’s also missing his friends from his old school. I was SO thankful I used that moment to ask if my son wanted to help me. We both went to bed happy and today started off so very well.
We’re finding our balance – whether it be in a homemade library or in the dirt in the front yard. Taking that moment to engage and connect with my sons in the midst of a very hectic and crazy life (that’s my label and I probably need to change it!) made this girl a momma to very happy little boys.
