The Parenting Post | Gun Violence + Safety in School

October 30, 2024

School should always be a safe place for our children and their educators, but the truth is, we know that isn’t always the case. There is so much that is out of our control during the school day. And in a time when we feel like we *need* to have all the answers for our kids, it’s important to remember that sometimes, we don’t–especially when it comes to their feelings of safety in school. Sometimes we don’t know the best ways to reassure them that they are safe, and that’s a scary thing to navigate as a parent.

Our kids are aware of a lot more than we may realize, especially as they get older. We may be finding ourselves needing to have deeper conversations with our kids about their safety in school and/or current events. Today, Albiona from The Parenting Post is sharing advice on how to talk with our kids about this heavy and important topic.

How do I talk to my kids about safety in school?

Most of our kids have done an active shooter drill, and that’s from kindergarten all the way up to high school. It might look different or be explained differently when they’re younger as compared to when they’re older. But either way, our kids are experiencing it and most likely having conversations about it in class–rightfully so, they may be feeling afraid. So, how do we navigate this with them as parents?

Try to limit the news in the house.

The first thing you can do is to limit the news in the house. I know this is hard because a lot of parents feel the need to watch the news to catch up on current events. But if you can really be mindful in making sure your kids are not around when you’re watching the news, that’s an important thing to do.

As an adult, you can watch the news and filter it and process it in a way that’s much different than a child or even a teenager. Your child can hear some of these sensationalized headlines and those can really stick with them, and then they’re really not able to process it in the same way. So we want to do that first and foremost: limit the media that’s on and around them.

Create a space for open conversation.

The next thing you want to do is create an open space for conversation so that they can ask you any question and understand that sometimes, your answer is going to be, “I don’t know. And I’m frustrated too.” You can admit that things feel scary to you too at times. It’s so important that you are comfortable saying, “I don’t know,” because there are moments where we truly don’t have the answer. We just don’t know why things happen sometimes.

You can also talk with your kids about ways that their school is keeping them and their classmates safe. You can bring up specific examples from their school, or talk about things that happened in your own school growing up. Many schools will send home materials or ways to have conversations around this. A great way to be able to navigate these conversations is to use similar language to what the school is using. And remember this: the younger the child, the harder it is for them to grasp what’s happening; the older the child, the more they’re going to think about it.

For our highly sensitive kiddos, you want to think about ways you can take them from feeling stuck in the feelings, and moving it into action.

A lot of times this might look like writing letters to people who could help us with this problem, like lawmakers or the local police department. Or maybe, if you know of kids in a school where this happened, they could write a letter letting them know that they’re thinking of and supporting them. You want to turn it into some type of tangible action–a way to take their pain and channel into service.

Talk about kindness to others.

Lastly, use this opportunity to talk about kindness to others without highlighting any kind of real sense of violence. We know that a lot of these current events included students who felt completely isolated–even bullied in some cases. We certainly want our kids to have an awareness around who in class needs a pal or someone to play with at recess. And also, we want to help our kids know who to talk to at school if they do have concerns about a classmate or situation. How can we make sure that everybody’s being kind to everybody? Who can you turn to if you are seeing kids who are mistreating others, and how can that be handled? Those are some really important places to start.

We don’t always know why or have the answers, and you’ll get more and more comfortable saying that as time goes on. But together with your kids, you’ll come up with really good solutions that will help everyone to feel a little better about their safety in school.

Safety in school is a big thing for our kids nowadays. If you’re looking for more resources on this topic, check out our How to Talk with Kids About Traumatic Events guide.

Come, Celebrate Diwali With Me!

VaibhaviUgavekar

October 26, 2024

As an Indian living in the USA, there are many things that I miss about my home country. I miss the people, I miss the food, I miss the heat, and I miss the traffic, but above all, I miss the festivities, especially during Diwali.

Diwali, or Deepawali, is one of the biggest Hindu festivals and is very dear to my heart. There are so many wonderful memories of my childhood during Diwali–the aroma of the sweets, the roar of the fireworks, the sight of beautiful lanterns and rangolis. The whole country is a remarkable sight!

*words in bold can be found at the bottom of the post in the glossary!

Significance of Diwali

I grew up with many Diwali stories from my grandparents, but the moral of all of the stories was the same. It is a celebration of “victory of light over darkness, good over evil, and knowledge over ignorance.”

Per Hindu mythology, it is believed that on Diwali, Lord Ram returned to his kingdom, Ayodhya, after 14 years of exile during which he fought and won a battle against the demons and the demon king, Ravana. The people of Ayodhya were overjoyed with his return and illuminated the entire kingdom with oil lamps and burst firecrackers for his welcome and so, this day of his return is celebrated as Diwali.

Preparing for the Festivities

To get in the festive spirit, houses are cleaned and colorful lanterns and lights are lit up. Beautiful rangolis are drawn outside homes, and delicious festive snacks are prepared prior to the start of Diwali. One of the prominent memories I have is making laddoos and chakalis with my mother. It really was a lot of work, but still a lot of fun!

Diwali Festivities

Depending on the Hindu lunar calendar, Diwali is celebrated for four to five days, with each day having its own significance.

Dhanteras or Dhantrayodashi

Dhanteras or Dhantrayodashi is the first day of Diwali and is dedicated to the worship of Lord Dhanwantari, the God of medicine. It is considered an auspicious day to buy gold. People tend to make a lot of jewelry purchases on this day.

Narak Chaturdashi or Kali Chaudas

Narak Chaturdashi or Kali Chaudas is the second day of Diwali and is called Choti Diwali in many parts of India. Per Hindu mythology, on this day, Lord Krishna killed the demon named Narakasur, freeing the world from his terror.

On this day, an “Abhyanga Snan” (a holy bath) is taken early in the morning. The bath consists of first massaging the body with essential oils mixed with herbs and spices called uptan, and then taking a shower with scented soaps. A mouthwatering breakfast with a variety of sweets and snacks awaits after this holy bath.

Laxmi Pujan

Laxmi Pujan is the third day of Diwali and the official start of Diwali. It is celebrated to worship Goddess Laxmi, Goddess of wealth, and Lord Ganesha, God of wisdom and remover of obstacles. Pujas are conducted in the evening by lighting diya (oil lamp) and offering flowers and sweets to seek the god’s blessings for good health, wealth, and prosperity. In some parts of India, people also worship cash, jewelry, cars, or anything valuable, as they consider these as their wealth.

Padwa

The fourth day of Diwali is called Padwa, which celebrates the bond between the wife and husband. On Padwa, the wife prays for the long life, wealth, and prosperity of her husband, and the husband showers the wife with gifts.

The day is also celebrated as Bali Pratipada, the day when Lord Vishnu’s avatar Vaamana took over all the three worlds from demon King Bali. The king was later sent to the underworld. As the king had a great affection for his people, he gained permission to visit the kingdom once a year. And since then, people celebrate the day as the homecoming of Bali as Bali Pratipada.

Bhai Dooj

Bhai Dooj is the fifth and last day of Diwali, and is celebrated to honor the relationship between siblings. It is said that Lord Yamraj, God of death was unable to visit his sister Yamuna for a long time. When he finally met her, he was greeted with a grand ceremony, offered sweets, and had the ceremonial tika placed on his forehead.

Being immensely pleased with the love and respect he was showered with, Yamraj gave Yamuna a boon. She, in turn, asked him to dedicate a day on which he would visit her house each year. Hence, the ritual of siblings visiting each other on this day began to honor the kinship between them. With modern times, gifts are exchanged between siblings on this day, and it is a very joyous occasion.

Kids and Diwali

As a child, I remember my school days when we used to have Diwali holidays for about two weeks. Our homework was to create a Diwali collage book with different topics and decorate it as wild as our imaginations could be!

Being away now, I have curated the following list of activities which will surely get young kids like my son excited to know more.

Diwali decorations craft kit from Jack in the Box: multiple craft kits to make rangoli, a fairy lights lantern, and Diwali door greetings
Rangoli puzzle from Kulture Khazana: a fun way to create rangoli with kids without the mess

The following books also provide an interesting way of educating kids about Diwali!

Amma Tell Me About Diwali! by Bhakti Mathur
Diwali by Hannah Eliot
Hurray for Diwali by Anita Raina Thapan
Shubh Diwali! by Chitra Soundar

This video is also a great snapshot of Diwali’s significance, and I highly recommend showing it to your kids.

Glossary

Lastly, here are some terms which you may come across when learning about Diwali!

Diya: A clay or metal lamp which is lit up with a cotton wick dipped in oil

Kandil or Akash Kandil: Colorful lighted lanterns which are hung outside the home

Rangoli: Hand drawn patterns of colorful sand on the floor, outside the home

Toran: A wall hanging décor that is hung at the home entrance

I hope you learned a little bit about my culture, and will come and celebrate Diwali with me! Wishing you a Happy Diwali from all of us at Detroit Mom!

For more Diwali resources, read what Molly has to share about this holiday.

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October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Kelcie Leedy

October 24, 2024

DISCLAIMER: The following post outlines the writer’s personal experience with breast health. It is not intended to act as medical advice. As always, please consult your doctor with any questions about breast health.

Breast Cancer Awareness Month is a cause that is close to my heart. There is a 1 in 8 chance that a woman will develop breast cancer in her lifetime, according to the CDC. Each one of those women has a life and a family. Several years ago, my grandma was one of them. She and several of my aunts battled breast cancer, and her mother, my great-grandmother, died from breast cancer.

Breast cancer awareness has been part of my life since I was young, due to this prevalence in my family. I watched my grandma go through the struggles of chemotherapy, losing her hair, and getting a mastectomy. Cancer takes a huge toll on a person and their family, but I was inspired by my grandmother’s resilience in the face of this terrible disease.

In her honor, I want to share some general information about breast cancer awareness and early detection, because these things are key to better outcomes for those who are affected.

Breast Self-Exam

Performing a breast self-exam is one of the easiest and most accessible ways to potentially catch a sign of breast cancer early on. You can do a breast self-exam daily if you want to, but the National Breast Cancer Foundation recommends performing a breast self-exam at least once a month.

A quick online search can provide helpful information on how to properly perform a breast self-exam, or you can ask your doctor for best practices.

Genetic Testing

My great-grandmother died from breast cancer, and my grandma and two of her sisters were also diagnosed. Because of the likelihood in her family, my grandma chose to undergo genetic testing. Genetic testing allows you to find out if you potentially have a gene that makes you more prone to having breast cancer.

If breast cancer does not run in your family, this option might not make sense. If you think this is something you are interested in, you can talk with your doctor to find out if genetic testing would be beneficial for you.

Mammograms

Mammograms can be intimidating, but it’s recommended that women over the age of 40 have a mammogram at least every two years. Women younger than 40 may also need a mammogram, depending on their risk factors. You can discuss when you need a mammogram with your doctor.

Mammograms are x-rays that are able to better detect abnormalities than a breast self-exam, and sometimes can find a lump before it can be felt. While mammograms may be uncomfortable, they are critical for early detection of a potential cancer. If a lump or abnormality is discovered during a mammogram, further testing is done to determine if it is cancerous.

Regular Check-Ups

Breast cancer prevention and awareness can be discussed with your primary care provider or OBGYN during your yearly appointment. You can discuss your personal risk factors and determine if further action should be taken based on your situation. Your doctor may also perform a routine breast exam at that time.

Your yearly checkup is a great opportunity to advocate for your health in general, but also a wonderful chance to ask questions about breast cancer and discuss what prevention or awareness methods may be best for you.

Be Vocal + Spread Awareness

Breast self-exams, mammograms, and talking with your doctor are all extremely important and necessary measures to detect breast cancer early, and hopefully allow for better outcomes. However, we all know that as moms, remembering to take care of ourselves can be difficult, and things that don’t feel “urgent” can sometimes slip under the radar.

This is why it’s so incredibly important to spread the word and normalize breast cancer awareness. Check in with your mom, sister, friend, or aunt. Talk about your own journey and the measures that you take to stay aware. Normalize breast cancer awareness, and be open to talking about it. Your support and encouragement could save someone’s life.

It’s so important to be informed. Jess shares more important information for Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

Nut-Free Halloween: A Mom’s Guide to Safe Trick-or-Treating

China Sellers

October 23, 2024

Disclaimer: The following post outlines the writer’s personal experience with navigating food allergies. It is not intended to act as medical advice. As always, please consult your doctor with any questions about managing food allergies.

Costumes, candy, and a cauldron of fun. For many families, Halloween is a time for kids to let their imaginations run wild and indulge in sweet treats. But with peanut and tree nut ingredients seemingly lurking in just about everything from chocolate bars to caramel and other candy-coated confections, Halloween can feel a bit more hair-raising for moms of kids who suffer from certain food-related allergies.

My five-year-old son was diagnosed with a severe peanut and tree nut allergy at just six months old. Since then, Halloween has become a delicate balancing act, where we enjoy the sugar haul while dodging the candy culprits that could send us to the emergency room.

Still, I’ve learned not to let the fear of food allergens be the boogeyman that haunts our Halloween spirit. My son absolutely loves this time of year. The excitement of dressing up and trick-or-treating is just as thrilling for him as it is for any other child. With a sprinkle of creativity and a healthy dose of vigilance, I’ve found ways to keep him safe, while ensuring this candy-laden season is all treats–and no tricks.

If you’re gearing up for Halloween with a child who has allergies to peanuts, tree nuts, or both, here are some tips to help keep your little goblins and ghouls safe while still having a fang-tastic time.

The Art of Vetting Tricks, Treats, + Nut-Free Eats

Before my son gets his hands on any Halloween goodies, we go through a sorting process. It’s not just about separating the chocolate from the gummies; it’s also about ensuring every treat is nut-free. I always remind him not to eat anything until I’ve had a chance to vet it thoroughly. This crucial step helps us avoid any scary surprises.

My son helps me check each piece while I explain what to look for. It’s a great way to involve him and teach him about his allergies in a relaxed setting. For us, it’s more like playing detective–every wrapper must be carefully inspected as if we’re part of the CSI: Candy Division.

Peanuts and tree nuts can be sneaky, hiding in treats where you’d least expect them. Just because the ingredient list doesn’t mention peanuts doesn’t mean the candy is safe; that’s where the real challenge lies. It’s also worth mentioning that the practice of vetting Halloween candy and treats is a good best practice for all parents and caregivers–even if your child doesn’t have a food-related allergy.

Pro tip: Set up a “Treat Sorting Station” after trick-or-treating. Use a few bins or bags labeled “Safe,” “Check,” and “Not Safe.” As you go through the candy, help your child sort each item into the appropriate bin. This hands-on approach makes it easier for kids to understand which goodies are okay and reinforces the importance of checking labels together. For any questionable items, you can take the time to research them together later.

Cross-Contamination: The Sneaky Saboteur

Even when peanuts or tree nuts aren’t listed as ingredients, cross-contamination can sneak up like a ghost. Candy made in the same facility as peanut products can still harbor traces of nuts, triggering serious reactions in some kids. That’s why candy labels are my best friend–every single wrapper gets meticulously inspected. I’m not just on the lookout for the obvious “peanuts” in the ingredients; I also keep an eye out for phrases like “may contain peanuts” or “processed in a facility that handles peanuts.” Depending on the severity of your child’s allergy, those tiny words can make all the difference between a safe snack and a potential trip to the hospital.

When it comes to Halloween candy, it’s important to remember that even if it’s individually wrapped, there could still be hidden dangers. If nut-free candy has been sitting near or stored in the same bucket as peanut-filled goodies, cross-contact can occur, as plastic wrappers can sometimes allow tiny particles to transfer. This is why the one-bite rule (mentioned below) is essential; it can help minimize the risk of a serious reaction.

However, since it often seems that a majority of candies and processed foods are made in facilities that handle peanuts, it’s crucial to rely on your own judgment when determining whether the risk is acceptable.

Pro tip: Create a “Safe Candy List” together with your child. Write down the treats that are nut-free and safe for them to enjoy. This way, your kiddos have a reference for future holidays or events and feel empowered to choose their favorite candies confidently. You can also check company websites and reach out to manufacturers to learn about their allergy policies.

Educating Your Children on Their Allergies

As children grow and become more independent, it’s essential for parents to teach them how to protect themselves, especially regarding their food allergies. My son, though still young, knows to ask, “Does this have nuts?” before eating anything.

We’ve made a habit of reading labels together, helping him become familiar with which brands and wrappers to look out for. While his nut allergy isn’t airborne, he understands that if something smells off or feels unfamiliar, it’s better to err on the side of caution and not eat it.

Helping kids understand their allergies is essential as they learn to navigate the world. By creating an environment where they feel safe speaking up, parents can empower their children to handle social situations with more ease, so food allergies don’t hold them back from enjoying life.

Pro tip: Engage in fun educational activities with your children that teach them about allergies. Consider crafting a colorful “Allergy Awareness” poster together or creating a game where they identify safe and unsafe snacks. These projects reinforce important safety lessons while allowing them to express their creativity.

Peer Snacks + Halloween Parties

It’s crucial for children with nut allergies to be aware of peer snacks during school parties or Halloween gatherings, where they’re likely to come across various treats brought by classmates, family, or friends. Homemade goodies can be especially tricky, though, since their ingredients might not be clearly disclosed.

Again, teaching kids to ask questions and be cautious can help them feel more confident in these situations. A great strategy is to pack a separate bag of safe treats for your child. This way, they can indulge alongside their friends without worrying about allergens.

Additionally, it’s essential to communicate allergy concerns to teachers, family members, friends, parents of classmates, and caregivers attending these gatherings. Ensuring that everyone understands the importance of vigilance can help create a safer environment for your child.

Pro tip: Develop a personalized “Allergy Action Plan” with your child that includes a list of their specific allergies, safe foods, and steps to take if they accidentally consume something harmful. This plan can serve as a valuable tool in various situations, such as school events, family outings, or play dates. It can also help ease the concerns of babysitters or caregivers by providing clear guidelines.

Take Small Bites: A Sweet Safety Tip

When it comes to enjoying Halloween treats, taking small bites can significantly enhance safety, especially for children with nut allergies. This practice encourages kids to be more mindful of what they’re consuming, allowing them to better assess each item for potential problem ingredients.

Smaller bites allow for easier identification of any unusual textures or flavors that may signal a potential allergen. This approach also promotes mindfulness, helping kids enjoy their treats without rushing, which can lead to careless nut consumption mistakes. And, if a child feels something is off, they can communicate it more easily without having consumed a large amount.

Pro tip: Implement the “One-Bite Rule” by prompting kids to take just one small bite at a time and wait a moment before taking another. It’s a simple habit that can help keep little ones safe while they enjoy their candy collection.

Nut Allergy Warning Signs: What to Watch For

Peanut and tree nut allergies can be incredibly dangerous, with reactions ranging from mild to severe. According to the American College of Allergy, Asthma, and Immunology (ACAAI), peanuts are one of the most common food allergens linked to anaphylaxis–a severe, potentially life-threatening condition that demands immediate medical attention. When my son had his first allergic episode, it began with sudden facial swelling, but things escalated quickly. Soon, he was struggling to breathe, his heart was racing, and vomiting set in.

Recognizing these symptoms early is crucial, as anaphylaxis can progress rapidly, and getting help fast is vital. Here’s what I’ve learned to look for:

Mild reactions: Hives, itching, or redness around the mouth.
Moderate reactions: Nausea, vomiting, or a runny nose.
Severe reactions (anaphylaxis): Difficulty breathing, swelling of the throat, or a rapid heartbeat. Anaphylaxis is a medical emergency, and if this happens, I know to administer his epinephrine auto-injector (EpiPen) immediately and call 911.

Having an EpiPen on hand is essential during Halloween–and every day–when your child has severe allergies. I always keep it close by, knowing it’s my best defense if an unexpected allergen sneaks into the mix.

Pro tip: Always carry two epinephrine auto-injectors with you, not just one. Severe allergic reactions can sometimes require a second dose if symptoms don’t improve after the first. Keep them easily accessible, like in a small bag or pouch you can grab quickly, and make sure anyone with your child (friends, family, or other caregivers) knows how to use it. Practicing with a trainer pen at home can help you feel more prepared, so you’re ready to act quickly if needed. Also, be sure to keep your EpiPen prescriptions current, as they do have important expiration dates.

Key Takeaways: Do’s + Don’ts for a Safe Halloween

Do:

Check all candy before letting your child eat it.
Teach your child how to read labels and ask questions.
Bring safe snacks to Halloween parties so they don’t feel left out.
Join the Teal Pumpkin Project: this initiative encourages families to provide non-food treats alongside candy to help make Halloween safer for kids with food allergies. If you put a teal pumpkin on your porch, it signals to trick-or-treaters that you have allergy-friendly options.

Don’t:

Don’t assume a candy is safe just because the ingredients look okay–always check for cross-contamination warnings.
Don’t eat unwrapped or homemade treats unless you’re sure they’re safe.
Don’t wait to act if your child shows signs of a reaction. Use the EpiPen and call 911 right away if needed.

Mom’s Secret Stash: As a lifelong peanut butter lover, I had to cut back after my son’s diagnosis. However, I admit that I save some of his discarded peanut butter treats for a little guilty pleasure pick-me-up and tuck them away where he can’t find them. If you’re in the same boat, exercise caution and set clear boundaries about when and where you indulge to keep your child protected.

Navigating a nut-free Halloween doesn’t have to be a scary ordeal. With careful planning, clear communication, and a touch of creativity, parents can help their children enjoy treats of the season without any frights.

Ultimately, it’s up to you to take a proactive approach, staying in tune with your child’s specific needs and assessing whether to take any risks based on their unique health situation. The best advice I can offer as a mom to a child with a severe allergy is to trust your instincts and make choices that feel right for your family. Happy trick-or-treating!

For more ideas on keeping your little ones with nut allergies safe and satisfied, check out our post with 20 allergy-friendly school snack and lunch ideas.

What You Should Know About PCOS

Detroit Mom

October 20, 2024

DISCLAIMER: The following post is not intended to act as medical advice. As always, please consult your doctor with any questions about PCOS.

“I was told I have PCOS, but I don’t know what that means. And no one really explained it to me. I’m confused and I’m a little overwhelmed.” Does this sound familiar? If you have been told you have PCOS and you feel confused, nervous, or alone . . . you are not alone.

Our friends from Michigan Center for Fertility and Women’s Health are here to support you on your fertility journey. You might have caught their Fertility Friday series over on our IG page–quick videos to answer common questions and provide information. Below, they’re sharing about PCOS: what it is, how it’s diagnosed, potential implications, and how it’s treated.

What is PCOS?

PCOS stands for Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome and it’s one of the most common hormonal reproductive conditions. It is a hormonal imbalance to some degree that can alter our hormones and affect many different aspects of our health and life, including our menstrual cycles and weight. PCOS may also cause other issues such as acne, hair growth issues, and fatigue, to name a few.

PCOS may look different for everyone–there is a very wide range of symptoms people may have, which can also change over time for individuals as well. Some people may have numerous symptoms or issues associated with PCOS; others may only have a few or more mild symptoms.

PCOS can cause issues with ovulation because your cycles may come more irregularly. Some people may get no periods, or only a few each year. People may also have high levels of androgens, which are our male hormones. Although some individuals may have normal levels from a laboratory standpoint, they may still exhibit issues with acne and hair growth associated with androgen excess or sensitivity. Individuals may also exhibit signs of polycystic ovaries on an ultrasound. These are some of the diagnostic criteria we evaluate when determining a diagnosis of PCOS.

*If an individual has two out of the three mentioned above, there is likely some level of PCOS present.

How is PCOS diagnosed?

PCOS is diagnosed through a physical exam, a detailed history, an ultrasound, and blood work. There’s a wide range of symptoms associated with PCOS in terms of severity and degree, which can also change over time. When we work to make positive changes to manage PCOS (whether it’s lifestyle changes, dietary changes, taking medication, etc.), a lot of the symptoms may improve dramatically.

Physical Exam

The physical exam may include looking for changes such as cystic acne, skin tags, hirsutism, or darkening of the skin commonly in the groin or behind the neck (known as acanthosis nigricans).

Body habitus, weight distribution, and BMI will also be evaluated. Weight gain or difficulty losing weight can be a very common and a burdensome issue for patients with PCOS.

Detailed History

A detailed history allows your provider to review all the symptoms, issues, other underlying health concerns, family history, and social history that may help in the diagnosis and treatment of PCOS.

Ultrasound

When performing the baseline ultrasound, we evaluate the endometrial lining or the thickness of the endometrium, as well as the ovaries, to see if they look polycystic in appearance. A polycystic ovary does not mean there are enlarged cysts throughout the ovary (although a larger cyst may also be present)—but rather an excess of multiple small follicles.

Bloodwork

Bloodwork may include liver and kidney function tests, average blood sugar (A1c), fasting blood sugar, insulin, and androgen hormones. We often check additional labs which may be relevant, such as thyroid and prolactin.

An additional work up may be indicated based on the findings from the history and testing.

What are some implications and issues from PCOS?

PCOS is often associated with infertility. However, there are also patients that are not actively trying to conceive, but desire management and treatment of their PCOS.

General Health

PCOS is commonly associated with insulin resistance. The extra insulin that’s circulating in our bloodstream and bodies may cause multiple issues. It can play a role in the hormonal imbalance, promote fat storage, cause extra weight gain, and increase the risk of health conditions such as diabetes, as well as other conditions such as high cholesterol and hypertension.

Fertility

Irregular or absent menstrual cycles may make trying to conceive more difficult. If ovulation is irregular or absent, it can be challenging to navigate when ovulation occurs, if at all. Many patients with PCOS need intervention to help them ovulate on a more regular basis.

Often when we address the underlying issues of PCOS, menstrual regularity may also improve. Lifestyle change in conjunction with medical management typically results in the best results and overall success. Each patient and treatment plan are different and are customized based on the underlying concerns and goals we are addressing.

Gynecologic Concerns

Irregular or absent menses may still be a concern even for those not interested in conceiving. We still produce hormones that can thicken our endometrial lining, particularly estrogen, and if that lining continues to thicken over time without a regular withdrawal, it can cause concerns and may lead to abnormal cell development and potentially higher risks for uterine cancer. Therefore, addressing menstrual irregularities is important even if we are not trying to conceive.

There are options such as birth control or other contraceptives that can help protect the lining from thickening. There are also other options aside from contraceptives for those that they may not be indicated or safe for, or for those simply not open to or interested in these choices.

Unpleasant + Annoying Symptoms

Hormonal acne, weight gain, hair growth, and sometimes thinning of the hair can be stressful and bothersome. These symptoms count too, even if you are getting regular periods and not trying to have a baby. These issues are certainly still a valid concern. Sometimes we work with dermatologists or endocrinologists for these issues, if needed.

What are the options for treatment of PCOS?

There are numerous options available for the management of PCOS. The options are dependent on what our ultimate goals are, which vary for each patient.

Whether trying to conceive or trying to manage symptoms only, a combination approach to PCOS is typically best and results in the most optimal outcomes. Based on a detailed work-up and history, medications such as Metformin, birth control, ovulation induction medications, as well as vitamin supplements may be recommended. Lifestyle changes including reduced carbohydrates, a Mediterranean diet, exercise, and stress reduction may likely also be a part of the treatment plan.

PCOS may also take a toll on our mental health; we offer therapy and counseling to all our patients to help with this additional burden. Individuals may have difficulty with getting on track or feel confused about their diagnosis, and this can be extremely stressful and overwhelming. We are here to help navigate your diagnosis and treatment plan every step of the way.

There are many options for fertility medication. Our previous post from Michigan Center for Fertility explains both oral and injectable fertility medication options.

Down Syndrome Awareness Month: What Support Really Looks Like

Jamie Freeman

October 19, 2024

It takes work to be friends with my family. The life of a parent of a child with a disability is hard, that’s not a secret. People tend to think they understand the hard parts: sleepless nights, endless doctor’s appointments, advocating for their educational rights, and on and on . . .

You want to know what the hardest part is? INCLUSION.

You WANT your kid to have friends. You WANT your child included in the neighborhood games. You WANT to be able to have some adult conversations with your friends while your kids ride their bikes.

For us–for parents raising children with disabilities–there’s something that NEEDS to happen that you have no control over in order to make this happen. Your friends that have typical children have to put in work to understand your child, so that they can help their children understand your child.

This sounds so easy. Sure, everyone wants to teach their children the beauty of differences. Everyone wants to teach their children that we all have worth regardless of our abilities.

But are you willing to allow my child to hurt your child? Yeah, read that again.

Are you willing to let your child cry because they got too close to my child while he was overstimulated and scratched their face? Are you willing to let your child be upset because my child took a toy out of their hands and ran away with it? Are you willing to invite my child into your home, potentially without me there as a crutch, and get to know what they are like without the whole world of stimulation around them?

Are you willing to understand the vast amounts of therapy we are doing to correct these behaviors, the amount of medications we’ve tried, and the amount of times we’ve cried uncontrollably to our support teams because we just can’t figure it out? Are you willing to do the VERY hard work, have the exhausting amount of hard conversations needed to explain to your child why MY child does these things and doesn’t get “punished” in the same way they would?

See? THIS is where it gets tricky.

THIS is where people start getting uncomfortable. And, THIS is why most of the parents of children with disabilities that I know have no social lives. They are secluded from family functions. It seems so simple to simply say you will not allow your child to be around a child who gets violent. But, is it? Is it that simple?

My girls love their brother. We do the work, the hard and time consuming work of helping them understand their brother. My girls know his cues, his triggers. They know when to get away from him and when to give him space. They still get hurt by his hands from time to time. My girls know he still loves them, and they know the scratches heal.

And you wanna know what? They are stronger and more empathetic because of it. They have emotional intelligence and conflict resolution skills beyond their years because of it. And your kid could too, but not without risk.

So to all the families living with a child with a disability that has moments like this, I see you. I know how hard it is to be you. I know how lonely it can get.

And to all the families with typical children that are willing to do the work to be friends with families like mine, you are the real superheroes. You are the village, the support, the vibe this entire world needs. You are doing the work that is NOT going unnoticed. And, you are stepping up and giving us more than we could have ever dreamed of simply by NOT giving up on us and hiding away.

I want to be clear, I don’t expect anyone to take this risk.

For the ones that do it for us, and you know who you are, your effort is everything. EVERYTHING. I promise, the emotional intelligence your children gain from the presence of my child will be beyond anything you could imagine.

We love sharing the stories of families in our community to help others feel seen and heard. Local mom Ashley shares about her child’s dual diagnosis of Down Syndrome and Autism.

The Food Allergy Guide to Halloween

Amanda Fogolini

October 18, 2024

For the 33 million Americans living with food allergies, Halloween can be a holiday that is literally scary. According to FARE (Food Allergy Research and Education), chances are, 1 in 13 kids will be trick-or-treating with food allergies and more than 40% of them have experienced a severe reaction to their allergen. These statistics are as of 2019 and are likely much higher today.

Halloween should be fun for all kids. However, food allergies cause additional anxiety on parents and kids alike for several reasons. Kids can often feel excluded from parties and activities involving food and candy. Parents spend extra time diligently label-reading. And most candy won’t be safe anyway because an allergen is an ingredient or because of the risk of cross-contact.

A Close Encounter

Recently, my son and I were at a Halloween event trick-or-treating. He noticed one table with Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups piled high. He decided to skip that table and go directly to the next one. Without giving it a second thought, someone at the table thought it would be a good idea to throw a piece of candy at him. The moment I saw their arm wind up, I yelled out, “No, he’s allergic!” I couldn’t believe that someone was about to throw a peanut butter candy at my son with a peanut allergy.

These close encounters are something we have to deal with more often than we wish we had to. My son was diagnosed with multiple food allergies at five months old, even before his first Halloween. He doesn’t let that hold him back from the fun of dressing up and going door-to-door.

However, instead of being excited at every stop during trick-or-treating, he’s trying to peek in the large bowl of candy to see if he recognizes anything he knows he can eat, and usually letting out a sigh because it’s more of the usual suspects. More candy that’s not safe for him. But, every once in a great while, he will run up to me excitedly holding up something that he doesn’t have to give away.

How YOU Can Help!

The Teal Pumpkin Project is an initiative to make trick-or-treating safer and more inclusive for those with food allergies, intolerances, and other conditions. Participating in The Teal Pumpkin Project means you offer non-food trinkets and treats that are safe for all trick-or- treaters. Therefore, no one feels excluded!

Each year, our household participates in The Teal Pumpkin Project by placing a teal pumpkin on our porch to let trick-or-treaters know we offer non-food items. And, honestly, some of the non-food items are a hit with all trick-or-treaters. Especially anything that glows!

Need ideas for non-food items to hand out? Where should we start? Here are some items that I recommend!

Bookmarks
Bouncy balls
Bubbles
Fidget toys
Glow necklaces or bracelets
Noisemakers
Pencils, erasers, or crayons
Slap bracelets
Spider rings
Stamps
Stickers or tattoos
Playdoh or slime
Vampire fangs
and so many more!

Tips and Tricks for Safe Trick-or-Treating with Food Allergies

There are a few things to remember when it comes to safe trick-or-treating for kids with food allergies.

Remember to always carry an epinephrine injector with you, even while trick-or-treating door-to-door.
Be sure to read and double check ALL ingredients before consuming any treats. Mini-size candies or individually wrapped foods may contain different ingredients than what you’re used to eating. Even something consumed safely last year could no longer be safe.
Stay away from any and all candy without ingredients listed on the wrapper.
Avoid eating while trick-or-treating. It’s best to wait until you can diligently read all labels before diving in.

Upcoming Allergy-Friendly Events!

Friday, October 25

Enchanted Halloween | 6:00-8:00 p.m. | Clarkston
Trick or Treat: Superheroes | 4:00-8:00 p.m. | Troy

Saturday, October 26

Trick or Treasure | 12:00-2:00 p.m. | Clawson
Trick or Treat: Superheroes | 12:00-3:00 p.m. | Troy

Enjoy and have a safe Halloween!

Looking for other fall activities to do with the family? Check out our full list of fall activities from A to Z!

How to Support Someone After a Late Miscarriage

KateLochner

October 17, 2024

In November of 2022, when I was at a routine pregnancy appointment, I got the news that our nearly 17-week-old baby’s heart had stopped beating. I had no idea what to expect. I had never previously had a miscarriage at any stage. Since there had been an increase in awareness around early miscarriage, I for some reason thought all miscarriages were the same.

Since I was a month into the second trimester, mine was considered a late miscarriage for which I needed to be admitted to the hospital and, if my body would let me deliver the baby naturally. To my great surprise, the labor was long, and contractions were still painful. I got an epidural, and I had to have an emergency D&C following the delivery.

Even though I wasn’t even halfway through the pregnancy, there was a recovery ahead of me both emotionally and physically. Thankfully I was lucky in that my village showed up for me in ways that I could have never known I needed. It was because of their love and support that we were able to grieve and begin to heal. Their love through action certainly got us through.

Here are some ways people supported me after my miscarriage, that I would recommend if asked how to help someone navigating the same path.

Be open to Venmo.

Sending money can feel so impersonal and rather “cold,” but there are unexpected expenses that come with a late miscarriage: buying a casket, working with a funeral home, and the impending hospital bills. I had no idea what a casket for that situation would cost. But thanks to the generosity of those around us, the cost was taken off through their monetary gifts. Not needing to worry about unexpected expenses in our budget allowed us to grieve our daughter with each other and our kids. It was a true gift.

Drop off goodies/groceries/easy-to-prepare meals.

Potentially unpopular opinion here, but meal trains or dropping off bulk meals can add more work than they take away–especially if there are kids in the house. Some people love them and that’s great! But here’s another option: Opt for sending food but in a way that allows for some freedom in preparation.

One of my best friends dropped off a couple of bags full of a variety of groceries–treats, drinks, boxed pasta meals, snacks. Since she was aware of my allergies, she knew exactly what to get. And further, she dropped it off at my door and texted me that it was there. While I wouldn’t have minded at all chatting, I deeply appreciated the hands-off, “we’re here for you, but no pressure” approach.

Gift a date night.

The timing just so had it that my in-laws were going to be in town when I happened to be recovering from my time in the hospital. This allowed my husband and I to go out the night we buried our baby. We went to the Christmas tree lighting in downtown Detroit. I think it was absolutely one of the best things we could have done for ourselves at that time.

A loss like a late miscarriage can not only wear on the mom and dad as individuals, but it also can wear on the husband and wife relationship. Grief is powerful, so there’s no better time to lean into each other and nurture the relationship. Being able to spend time and focus on each other helped us to grieve as a unit and that brought us closer than we’d ever been.

Reach out three to four weeks after.

Everyone reaches out when the news is fresh. It’s when things go silent, but you’re still grieving, that can be an isolating and particularly difficult time. We received flowers more than a month later and it was incredible what the gesture did for my morale. The thoughtfulness just kept seeing me through.

Remember the due date.

I won’t lie–nearing the due date can feel mildly tortuous. For months, that date was seared into memory. We had been planning house projects around that date. Our kids knew that date. So when late March arrived, I thought, “How am I going to get through April?” But I had a couple of people in my life who remembered and reached out, and it helped tremendously. My husband and I also set aside that day to spend together as a family.

Send a personal memento.

This can be an incredibly thoughtful gesture for a loved one who is navigating a late miscarriage. A dear friend from college sent a personalized ornament, and another sent me a beautiful handmade letter. My best friend brought home a memento ornament from a trip, and my sister-in-law sent me a necklace with Gemma’s name on it. These gifts just made me feel like my baby was seen. One of the hardest aspects of miscarriage is feeling like you’re grieving this silent, invisible loss. Their thoughtfulness in recognizing the loss was so deeply moving to me, and each gesture helped see me through another day.

Before going through my own loss, I would have never known how to show up for someone I loved during a time like a late pregnancy loss. Even with the purest intentions, it’s hard to know what to say or do. We’re often scared of doing the wrong thing, sometimes so much so that we avoid showing up for someone entirely. The list above holds ways people close to me made me feel so loved and seen. I’m grateful I have their example to carry with me should I ever have to be there for someone I love who goes through a pregnancy loss. I hope this list can help you, too.

If you are navigating pregnancy or infant loss, please reach out. Our Infertility + Loss Support Group is here for you, for whatever you may need.

Detroit Mom’s Local Love Spotlight: Brooke Rozzie Coaching

Whitney Cornelli

October 13, 2024

Detroit Mom’s Local Love series highlights local women and the businesses they have built. We love supporting small business! Today’s Local Love Spotlight belongs to Brooke Rozmenoski, owner of Brooke Rozzie Coaching.

To start, we asked Brooke to share a few fun facts about herself with us!

She is a mom of two.
She is in school to be a licensed Christian Counselor.
She and her husband met in the fitness field.

We asked her to share a little bit more about her business with us, too. Get to know Brooke and her business, Brooke Rozzie Coaching, below!

How did you come up with the idea of your business, and how did you start?

“After being in the fitness field for eight years at the time I went through my own personal health struggles with no answer and started to see a lot of what I had experienced in my clients who felt like they were doing everything but weren’t feeling good with no clarity. I went back to school for a two-year functional nutrition program because I wanted to help women solve the things I was seeing missing in the fitness space for them.

“After having our daughter I left a regional role at a large fitness company and taught group fitness classes to help fill the financial needs while I took clients.”

Knowing what you know now, is there anything you would have done differently when you were first starting out?

“Hired a business mentor right away!”

What is the best business advice you’ve ever been given?

“You’re not going to be for everyone, and that’s okay.”

Have you faced adversity in business due to being a woman? How did you navigate that?

“I don’t believe so. I have had to navigate more because I am a mom and learn boundaries quickly.”

How do you persevere in challenging times?

“Knowing there is a deeper purpose and lesson God is needing me to learn through it so I can step into the next thing coming with who I need to be for it.”

What impact do you want your business to have?

“To change the narrative on how women and our daughters view their body and navigate nourishing themselves. We weren’t meant to feel exhausted, burned out, and stuck in our body–women are really powerful and how we feel in our skin is often stopping us from the bigger purpose God has for us.”

What are the pros and cons of being a woman business owner in 2024?

“Pros? My daughter and son get to see me do scary things and take on challenges. Cons? I’m not sure, I don’t focus on those things–I just focus on what my purpose is supposed to be because I find focusing on what could hold me back doesn’t help.”

What knowledge would you share with someone who wants to become an entrepreneur?

“Find someone who is where you want to be and ask for their help. Listen to what your purpose is meant to be, it doesn’t have to mirror everyone else–failure is a learning tool.”

What do you do for personal and professional development?

“I am in a mastermind and have a mentor.”

What mantra or quote do you live by?

“Stay true to your principles and beliefs but never stop growing and evolving as a person. -My Dad.”

What’s your favorite place in Detroit or Michigan?

“My home 🙂 I’m a homebody!”

Where can our readers find you on social media?

You can follow Brooke Rozzie Coaching on Instagram!

We hope you loved getting to know more about Brooke + Brooke Rozzie Coaching. Be sure to check out our previous Local Love Spotlight featuring Mama Shu + Avalon Village!

Terror on Tillson: Everything You Need to Know Before Visiting

Elizabeth Lewis

October 12, 2024

One of the nation’s biggest Halloween displays is right here in Metro Detroit! The small town of Romeo gets extra spooky every year and brings in thousands of visitors to view the elaborate decorations at the homes on Tillson Street. This attraction is known as Terror on Tillson.

Terror on Tillson started several years ago with residents of the street creating over-the-top displays at their homes. Year after year, the displays grew larger, and more neighbors joined in on the seasonal fun. Participation in the neighborhood is on a volunteer basis, and there is no organization that puts on the event. All decorations, displays, and candy are done by the homeowners themselves. Homes participating with Terror on Tillson displays see upwards of 2,000 trick-or-treaters per home, and thousands more in the weeks leading up to Halloween!

Here’s everything you need to know to plan a trip over to Terror on Tillson!

When should we go?

Displays begin to set up in early October, and there is no official opening day. Final displays are not up until the week leading up to Halloween. Devils’ Night (October 30) serves as the dress rehearsal, and Halloween itself is the grand finale. You can view displays day or night, rain or sun! Most displays stay lit until 10:00 or 11:00 p.m. each night. We had just as much fun walking during the day.

Our favorite time to go is a week or two before Halloween, and keep in mind that the darker it is, the spookier it is! With displays being built up until the last minute, you’ll see more if you wait a little longer, but the crowds will also be much larger.

Where should we park?

Do not attempt to park or drive down Tillson Street! There are several parking lots in the area that have a small fee (they usually go to a local sports team or organization) OR you may get lucky with FREE parking. You could also park on Pleasant, Croswell, or Sisson Streets, which all surround Tillson.

How does it work?

There is no cost associated with viewing the homes–just pick an end of the street and start walking! There are a lot of great photo ops you won’t want to miss. Do not attempt to drive and view the displays, though. The foot traffic will block most of the viewing, and it is a safety concern for those on foot if drivers are distracted. And, please remember not to touch the displays!

What happens on Halloween night?

Trick-or-treating happens on October 31 from 6:00-8:00 p.m. The street will be closed to all vehicle traffic from 5:30-8:30 p.m. to keep those trick-or-treating safe!

Where can we grab a bite to eat before or after?

There are a lot of great options both in and near Downtown Romeo! In town, you can visit Thee Office Pub or The Rustic Bluebird (only open Tuesday through Friday until 3:00 p.m.). Just outside of town, you can check out Art and Jakes. There is also a Dairy Queen on Tillson Street so you can get treats while you walk!

What else is there to see?

A lot more residents of Romeo are getting in on the Halloween fun, so check out displays across town, including Pleasant Street, which is next door to Tillson. There are also a lot of other fall activities happening nearby! Check out Blake Farms or Westview Orchards for hayrides, outdoor play areas, and even alcoholic, cider-based beverages.

Other Important Information for Terror on Tillson

There are no public restrooms.
Midway on Tillson, there are t-shirts, cookbooks, and coozies for sale with all proceeds raised going to the Buzz Lee Memorial Scholarship Fund.
Candy donations are welcome at any home, as families see a lot of trick-or-treaters on Halloween!

After you check out Terror on Tillson, maybe you’ll really feel in the spirit! Jump in and follow along with our 31 Days of Halloween Activities and Fun!

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