The Last of All Firsts: No More Babies for Us

They say the days are long, but the years are short. 

I will miss these years. The excitement of telling my husband we are pregnant, listening to the heartbeat at all of the ultrasounds, finding out baby’s gender, the first kicks, the miracle it is to create this baby…and a life. I will miss it. 

Our home for the last eight-plus years was filled with Pack ‘n Plays, Rock ‘n Plays, baby swings, bouncers, and all things Baby Einstein, each one of them back and forth from the attic. Little by little, they outgrew the baby gear, one by one.

Most recently I parted with my son’s baby clothes. The newborn scent is gone. Holding each item made me try to remember who got it for him, where we were when we received it, and how much I loved dressing him up in it.

I recently realized this is the last of all firsts for us.

Baby, Birth, Gift, Child, Babies

Letting it all go

With each purge, there was a feeling of relief but also some sadness. The last nap had already been taken in the Rock ‘n Play, and the last peaceful swing happened while I got a few things done. Rummaging through clothes and toys, I’d keep asking myself, “Does this spark joy?” Of course it all did, but would it spark MORE joy with another family? Without a doubt, YES.

Sleepless nights are now a thing of the past. When they do wake up from a bad dream or a tummy ache, I let them crawl into bed with us, sometimes, mostly because we’re too tired to get out of bed. But, I also love watching them sleep in between their dad and me, just like they did when I nursed each one to sleep. I will miss nursing so very much. The connection created during that time is priceless. The best advice I got was to take a picture of your last nursing. Take it, and frame it. I couldn’t look back at this for months! Again, I realized that my son was the last baby I would nurse…the last of all firsts. 

Last week of nursing my baby (March 2017), 15 months old

You see, it’s not that I don’t want to more kids; heck, I wanted five or six! We were made to procreate. It’s a natural feeling for me. But we are done. My husband is done. Could I have talked him into another one? Probably. We are a great team, and I want it to stay that way. Older kids come with new challenges that require a different kind of attentiveness in my opinion. Plus, being a stay-at-home mom has been the greatest blessing, but I, too, want my sanity, body, and some adult time back. I am looking forward to doing what I love. It is time. We can happily say we are complete.

Our party of five

Our oldest is turning nine, our middle is six, and our baby is three. All growing. Way. Too. Fast. I want to freeze time some days but others I can’t wait for them to end and go to bed. We may not have a newborn, aka: the trenches of car-seat blowouts or 3 a.m. feedings, but I do hope we never forget those moments that tested our marriage and willingness to keep going when all I wanted to do was sleep the day away. 

As we loaded the minivan, donated all the baby items, and drove off, my husband was thrilled! Almost as if ready to celebrate! I felt this sense of relief and, again, some sadness. As quick as the sadness came on, it left me with the thought that we will never forget those times. The last first step, first word, first haircut, first Christmas, and first birthday. We did it, and we survived!

Closing the chapter on having more kids is so hard. I look forward to the days of them growing up into young adults and witnessing all they do while cheering them on the entire way. I hope they, too, remember how much we cherished our time being their parents.

Is your family complete?
How did you know?


  1. Mama to 6 here. And oh my word, I could have written this. How do you know when you are done having babies? When you are. When you can say “I dont want anymore babies.” I could not understand being done, until I was. But oh, oh, oh, do I miss those days. I am definitely weepier than normal these days. My youngest graduated out of diapers last summer. 13.5 years of diapers for this family. His new sense of independence makes me catch my breath. And his middle school aged brothers make me wanna cry. But I am thankful for all the moments. And would never wish for anything other than the life I have been blessed with.

    Thank you for sharing your heart.

    • Thank you for sharing! It’s such a personal decision after one or six! Hope all you’re kids are doing great! Keep up the great work!

  2. Thank you for sharing this post. I’m only really beginning experiencing the last of all firsts and it’s not easy. My kids are almost 7, almost 4 and the baby is soon to be 9 months old. We are done! Our minivan sits 8 so we could keep going but it’s time to stop storing all those baby things. As I give them away I feel anxious and yet there is some lightness that comes from that process. We would love to have more babies but it feels like three is hard enough and fun enough for us…

    • I know the feeling! My youngest is now 3.5 and honesty it’s so exciting to see all the things we can do now as they are getting older. It’s great! Enjoy your babies! Thank you for sharing😊


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